What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree it can hurt you? A pool table.

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What is the difference between a girl and a boy? Well, a girl has two x-chromosones but a boy has and X and a Y chromosone.

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What did the nazi say to the jew? im gay

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An Asian walks out of the library.

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What is 0+0? 0, I am not dumb

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How did the girl die? 25.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

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Why is it incorrect that the universe will end in 2012? Because profound idiocy doesn't always occur.

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What's the most common pickup line in a gay bar? "Hi, may I buy you a drink?"

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A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in the front of his pants. He is given some very strange looks from the patrons both due to the fact that he has a steering wheel in his pants and because people wearing traditional pirate garb are a rarity.

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Why didn't Timmy have a girlfriend ??? Because he's a Fruit bowl !

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A prostitute has sex with a man. She gave him herpes.

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Why was the ghost boy sad? He was attending his own funeral.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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What is different between a pile of dead infants and a red ferrari? Being the victim of a mass murder.

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, who shat in my garden

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Mmmmmmmmbutch

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how do you get a taco? Buy one!

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What do you call a Fish without the I? Astyanax mexicanus, or the Blind Cave variant of the Mexican tetra

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Q: What do you call an American who has both Irish and Italian ancestry? A: An American.

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What's funny about using a shake weight? It resembles masturbating with a penis.

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Jim: "Hey guess what" Bill: "What" Jim: "George Bush got reelected" *Bill proceeds to throw himself into the Atlantic Ocean.*

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Q: why was the cow in the middle of the road? A: because it was dead

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Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Bushes are Red, Trees are Red... my garden is on fire...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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