Last night I had a Chinese By that I mean I abducted some Chinese people and ate them

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Two guys walk into a bar the third guy ducks

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What do you do when a man in a corner offers you candy? You walk away.

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Let's not pick mushrooms in heaven.

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why is santa so jolly? hes not hes a fictional character made up by our parents imagination

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Quick its the weed hide the cops! ... wait...

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How do you make someone think your wierd? Pretend to be a panda.

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Here's a little diddy I wrote for One Direction: Now One Direction, don't forget that we all know About the antics that you pull at your own live shows Like you take your own lyrics and give 'em a swerve Now they either make no sense or make you sound like pervs And Liam, why you swiping cameras and phones? What you need a girl's number cause you're crusin alone? And another thing, it's a frickin spoon for God's sake What did this thing impale your puppy with a giant frickin stake? And so One Direction, we now all think That in about a year, y'all are gonna go N*SYNC and disappear cause N*SYNC isn't around any...aw you know!

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Q:What did grandma get for christmas? A:a coffen

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If you don't see any banners here, it doesn't mean they aren't here.

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roses are scarce, violets are farse, come over here and i'll stick it up ya ar#e.

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Did you hear the one about the man who fell asleep on the job? He woke up.

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What does Santa do on Halloween? He gives out candy to the kids who come to his door.

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Shut the cork up!

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There is a middle-eastern man in customs with a turban and a briefcase and he is profiled by his race which is a sad fact of our society.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple Plenty of things

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I think I lost my number so can I... No you can't because phone numbers can't be lost

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Women Driving.

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why did the homeless man buy a mansion? he didn't. i lied. he would need a job to be able to buy a mansion.

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What did the man with cancer do? Die

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What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

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A YouTube brawl began between two gentlemen in the comment section. They agreed to a final answer and moved on.

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What did the young girl say to her step-dad? Nothing. She no longer talks to him after years and years of sexual abuse which left her emotionally scarred.

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a white kid is called on by his teacher he is promptly sent to the principle's office after not complying.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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