Why did the man go bald? He had cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Did you hear about the guy that dropped the soap in prison? He apparently gripped it a bit too tightly causing it to slip out of his hands, but managed to pick it up promptly and finish showering with no further incidence.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Three men are travelling in a hot-air balloon, but it starts to go down over an uninhabitable desert. One of the men must sacrifice himself to save the other two by jumping overboard to reduce the weight in the balloon. Nobody is brave enough to volunteer, and they all die painful deaths.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

one day a boy was in his bed he woke up and stepped on his carpet,he then got out a bowl and some breakfast, 23 minutes later the boy rode to school on his bike and parked it in a bike room, he then sat down at his seat and pulled out his history book and waited for Mr Jonty Nicholls to finish his coffee so he could learn about hitler.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down -14

When I exited the hospital one day, I spotted a sign saying "Come back soon!" Soon afterwards I saw people protesting to ban dihydrogen monoxide. The next day on tv I saw an ad for a solar powered lightbulb. Then I saw a Gun control poster. I cried, this being the dumbest thing I had seen yet, and the world was certainly doomed due to humanity's general stupidity. I saw a chicken crossing a packed road. Why did the chicken feel the urge to cross the road?

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's the difference of 13 and 4? 9

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the girl fall down the hill? Her boyfriend pushed her.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why was the crazy person allowed to leave the asylum? The ombusman's report will be on your desk this morning minister.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why couldn't the old lady take her Afghan Hound to the vet after the dog had been brutally harassed? She was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How do you cripple a fireman? You push him down the stairs.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q: Why cant dinosaurs talk A: Because they are dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the chicken cross the road ? To get to the other side . Unfortunately , there was a car accident and shrapnel from the explosion [caused by gas on fire] cut his head off causing the old woman to faint , and later die a horrible death .

thumb_up thumb_down -16

how do u keep a stupid person in suspense? how

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Wanna hear a dirty joke? A pig rolls in the mud.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Oh," the boy says. "Well BUENOS DIAS to you too!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What has two legs and is red all over? Half a cat

thumb_up thumb_down -16

ok, a family walks into a talant agency, the talent agent says "What can you do". The family breaks out into a sing and dance routine, and do nothing sexual in their routine.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Knock knock Who's there My BUTTCRACK

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Joe diragi is gayer than elton john

thumb_up thumb_down -16

give me thumbs up or i'll rape u to death

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple Not the holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -18

How do you call a dog with no legs? You can't call it, you have to go and pick it up.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, violets are blue, get out of the garden it's time for lunch.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops