What do you call a kid with cancer? screwed

melon

Men's Sports

What has four legs and starts with the letter D? A cow.

Q. How do you make an oil lamp turn off? A. Break it.

We are lawyers

What did one computer say to the other? 100111010100100111001010010001110101110010100010101011010011010010111000010101100100100100001101010000011111010010011010100110101001010100101010101010100101011010010010101010110010110010100100010101010101010

How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

hardy har har.. i should be working on a school project right now!!

President Donald Trump

A three and a half foot tall clown walks into a bar, it is quickly learned that he is only 8 years old and is excorted out by security.

sit on your hand until it goes numb and then touch yourself.

What is sad about a kid dying in a bus accident? The other 20 survived

How many dead babes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? its not possible because there all dead

Knock Knock Who's there? the mailman.

Why did the kid fall off the swing? He had no arms.

Doctor: "I'm sorry, but your son has Hepatitis B. Asian Parent: "Why he has Hepatitis B? Why he not get the Hepatitis A plus?"

An under aged man walks into a bar. the bar tender forgets to ask for his ID and gives him a beer. That man was later fired.

how many Pikachu's can you get in a mini? 14.

Why did a mass amount of people move to Florida? They came to murder their children and get away with it.

A man walks up to a horse and asks, "why the long face?" The horse stares back at him, blankly. The man then sits and ponders his life, sad that he now tries to communicate with horses and realizes that his eccentricity is probably the reason his marriage failed.

Why did samantha die? Because she had cancer.

What do you call a black priest? A black priest

What do you call a man who is dirty, and is searching through a pile of garbage? A man who threw out his divorce papers.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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