What's grey and can't fly? A Parking Lot.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Yo momma's so fat, she had a heart attack and is currently hospitalized.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What is big, white and hairy A refrigerator, I lied about the hair

thumb_up thumb_down +14

girl: why do you love me? boy: i don't.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

1912, the titanic sinks, 1913 ww1 starts, 1939, ww2 starts, 1954, the vietnam war starts, 90's, cold war. wow! the 20th century sucked.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What is the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How do you confuse Helen Keller? You don't. She's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A player under the tag "KiTcHeNGuRLxGaMerZ143" got a message after finishing a map on call of duty. "lol ur good."

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees an officer standing on a street corner and a pile of burning rubble behind him. He asks the officer what happened and he replies "A bomb fell from the sky and annihilated the city orphanage. 214 children were killed and two nearby families of 3 and 6 were severely injured and are now in the hospital with no hope of survival." The man was found dead later that week with a self-inflicted gunshot wound to the head.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How much fun does a gay guy have? A butt load.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Wombat monkey juice.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

guys stop with the jewish jokes anne frainkly its getting old

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Knock knock Who's there Your son and his vagina.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call a feline attempting surgery? A catastrophe, because they aren't very good surgeons.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What time is it? Ask chuck Norris! Gosh!!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Roses are red Violets are blue NO SHIT EINSTEIN!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: How do you kill an Asian? A: Deprive of calculator or shoot it.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse, thus lacking cognitive capacity to speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and promptly defecates on the floor then gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few chairs and tables.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How do you get a blond to fall over? Shoot her with a shotgun.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why couldn't the black man swim He never learned how.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q: What did the latino kid get for christmas? A; Nothing because he died two days before

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the orphan get for Christmas. A key chain.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How do you lose your train of thought? You can't. It is impossible to fit a full size locomotive in the human skull.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the boy with no eyes get for Christmas? Glasses

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops