your momma's so fat i almost didn't have sex with her.... almost.

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how many A.D.D. kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?lets go play!

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What's brown and smelly? Poop.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender does not ask about its facial characteristics, because he is wondering why there is a horse standing in his bar.

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Q:whats comes back to life and says RAR A;jesus

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If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it does it make a sound? I don't know... Does the deaf woman locked in my basement?

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Let's not pick mushrooms in heaven.

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Q: What's the difference between sheetrock and drywall? A: nothing. It's just two names for the same thing.

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Why can't George Washington drive? Because he died!

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Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

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There are two muffins in an oven. One muffin says to the other "dang, it's really hot in here." Realizing that muffins can not talk the other muffin wakes up to a very hungry man biting his face.

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What is translucent and smells like a carrot ? A translucent carrot.

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What do you call a black midget with no legs and has 11 fingers? A human being

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When Life gives you lemons, Make Orange Juice!

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Jackson's dad told him to "play in the traffic".

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What do you call a black man who walks into a jail cell? A hard working and dedicated police officer who was just putting his first offender in jail.

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take out the f in way. there is no f in way. I see what you did there.

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Row row row your boat Right to KFC Put some kool-aid in your cup And toast to you and me

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wanna no wats not funny........ aids

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Why was there a black guy in the back of a police car? He was caught stealing

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Why was Luke named Luke Skywalker? Because he walks to skies.

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Snarf Nuggets

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Q: What do you call a black man's dead bodie? A: A corpse.

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Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock The person you are seeking is deaf and cannot hear the sound that is made when your knuckles come in contact with the door. Try calling next time..........

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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