Knock Knock Who's there? I don't know Then why should I care I don't know

A gentleman walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "What can I get for you?" The gentleman replys that he would like a beer. After the bartender fulfils the gentleman's order, the gentleman drinks his beer and enjoys it.

Why did the cat eat the cupcake? Cause he was hungry.

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline. Notice how Anti-Joke MISSPELLED "user", writing "uses" instead. Probably most of you didn't notice until I posted this :)

What’s black and white and red all over? A zebra in a meat grinder

Why couldn't the boy sing? The boy could sing, but the thick layer of duct tape prevented him from doing so.

A neutron goes into a bar and asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?" The bartender, millions of times larger than the infinitesimally small subatomic particle, does not hear his question and so does not reply.

.ellipsis { text-overflow: ellipsis; /* Required for text-overflow to do anything */ white-space: nowrap; overflow: hidden; }

Why are elephants gray? So you don't get them confused with blueberries.

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

Roses are red Violets are blue your mum went to the loo and out came you

when does lady gaga wake up? when she dreams about a bad romance

What did the black kid get for his birthday?

An airplane crashes into a state park. There are no survivors. Susan continues her stroll in the park, considering she is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair, she isn't aware of the nearby disturbance

Whats funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown costum

A pig and an elephant walk into a bar. But the pig doesn't even make it into the bar because the mentaly insane elephant ate him. Ouch

What's spotted and has dildos strapped to their neck? Jews

You know what they say about big feet... Wow, those are some big feet.

What did the hooker say to her employer after 1 hour....you owe my $20

why did the cute baby start crying?? because its feet were eaten by rats.

Your mom is so fat, she is having angioplasty. She might need a ride a home.

What did the firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire? -Let's go home

The king has three daughters. One day, one of the daughters comes into his room and asks, "Father, why is my name Rose?" King replies,"well, a rose petal fell on your head when you were a baby." The next day, the second daughter comes into his room and asks,"Father, why is my name Tulip?" the king replies,"A tulip fell on your head when you were a bay." On the next day, the final daughter comes in and says, "BLAJSFUAGHASRAKKKKKK." The king says,"Shut up, Cinderblock."

A African American male and a Mexican male are both in a car, who is driving? Most likely the owner or the car.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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