Yo momma's so ugly, she decided to get plastic surgery and now has much higher self-esteem.

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What did the little boy with cancer say right before he died? Nothing. He was very sick and could not speak at all during his final weeks.

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LeBron James hits a game winning three with time running out in the Finals.

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Surprise mother father (A+)

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Miss Polly had a Dolly who was sick sick sick So she called for the Doctor to come quick quick quick The doctor came with his bag and his hat And he knocked on the door with a rat-tat-tat. He looked at Polly's Dolly and he shook his head. He said she had leprosy and must have all her limbs amputated.

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A man walks into a bar. - - - - - - - - -

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Robin get in the car.

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This guy dies and his wife gets him cremated. She takes the ashes home and lays them out on the table and starts talking to them. "You know that fur coat you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money. You know the new car you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money." Then she whispers, "You know that blowjob I promised you? Well, here it comes..."

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What did the little orphan boy get for Christmas? Nothing because he had died six months prior to Christmas due to the horrible living conditions of the orphanage.

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Why did Charlie Sheen laugh at the TV? Because there happened to be a comedy on.

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- I shot the sheriff! - You murderer

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A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim walk into a bar. I don't know what happens next, I got the fuck out of there before shit went down

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You should really respect vegetables more. They rock. They're all like... AAAHH!!!... and I'm all like... DUDE! THAT'S SO INCREDIBLY RANDOM!... and seriously, you should respect da veggies!

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what did the cat say when he walked into a room full of dogs? Get meowt of here!

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Knock-knock. Who's there? The Chicken.

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I love you, you live me. Now get the FUDGE out of the tree!!!

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What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? I don't eat hot dogs. Thank you though.

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What's the worst part about seeing a dead baby on the beach? The crushing sadness.

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What do you get when you cross some eggs and some toast? Breakfast.

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Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas? There is no Santa Claus.

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What did the poor sickly orphan get for Christmas? Nothing.

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My doctor recommended I take anger management classes. That really pisses me off.

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BALL SO HARD... That I got kicked off the team for intentionally fouling other players whenever I got on the court, I'm sorry

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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