Why did the blond play Russian roulette? She is very poor and needs the money so she can feed her son.

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Why did the blonde buy a hotdog? She didn't. She has chronic anorexia.

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Q: Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? A: Because he's dead.

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Q:What's red and fluffy? A: A blue rock, if blue were red and rocks were fluffy

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What did the old lady say when she went to a restaurant? OH look at the price of this salad.

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What would be the consequence of a terrorist detonating a 500 kT nuclear bomb in Manhattan? A ridiculous question. All enriched uranium in Pakistan is safe and out of reach of terrorists, their govt. has assured. Please ask about realistic scenarios next time.

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What do get when you cross a truck and a cliff? Flames.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't a drunk driver went off the street and hit the chicken and killed it on impact.

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A young girl falls off a swing, she is paralysed from the neck down and unable to walk every agian.

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Knock-Knock. Who's there? The person knocking at your door.

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What did the gay man say to the other gay man? Hey, we're both gay, let's have sex!

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If life gives you lemons, you shoud be thankful it didn't give you AIDS.

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A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

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Suzie has no arms and no legs and is on a swing. what happened? she fell and died knock knock whos there? not suzie.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he can't fly

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Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop?...... Dr Dre.

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Why i Hate people. They are alive. The are breathing. The are near me.

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It’s dead.

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Whats worse than the holucaust.......... Nothing

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what did the muffin say to the other muffin when they were in the oven? hi, im a muffin

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What did 6 say to 7? Nothing, numbers are abstract concepts thought up by humans and therefore, they cannot speak or converse in any sort of language.

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Knock-Knock who's there? Artichoke Artichoke who? Your friend Artie choked on a ham sandwich, and I'm sorry to inform you that he didn't survive.

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What did the cow get for Christmas? A tree

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A cruise ship took sail. It was about a mile out into the water already. The blonde had missed the ship when it set sail. She was only capable of swimming a mile. She swam a half a mile out after the ship, and then turned around. She then later died due to a severe case of hypothermia due to the temperatures of the water for long periods of time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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