why did the frog cross the road? because he was attached to the duck

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Roses are Purple Chickens are gray I'm color blind You have cancer I'll see you in hell Ba bye now

thumb_up thumb_down +16

BenWuzHear

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Romans rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What is red and doesnt exist? No-tomato.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How do you stop a second date from happenin? You force a dead mouse in your date's vagina.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the orphan get for Christmas. A key chain.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why did the jew cross the road? the ss was chasing him and his family to kill him so he ran across the street to same his family, he got hit by a truck and his family was killed...

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the pornstar do after the film shoot? Called her parents and said she had a good day at work as a receptionist at a law firm. She is too ashamed to admit her real profession to them. She then cried profusely.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the pastor say to the rabbi? Hi (or some other greeting)

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the plane crash? Why? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's heavy, black, and when hanging by a rope from a tree, makes white people happy? A tire, in any white football player's backyard.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A women in her kitchen hears a thud outside. Her husband fell off the roof.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Hey guys wanna here a joke? Never mind it was a gay joke but f**k it.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A: B: No pun intended.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why do gay guys like push pops? Because they are a delicious lollipop treat.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How much fun does a gay guy have? A butt load.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

mc hammers income.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A player under the tag "KiTcHeNGuRLxGaMerZ143" got a message after finishing a map on call of duty. "lol ur good."

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How many dead babies fit into a bathtub? 23

thumb_up thumb_down +14

The knocking didn’t cease. It grew harder as the voice grew louder. “Let me in! Let me in! LET ME IN!” The knocking grew so fierce it could have shattered the door. Tears leaked from her eyes. “What do I do,” she thought “should I open the door?” The knocking was more than she could bear. “I know you’re in there, Kat.” it said. Her stomach twisted, her breath caught in her throat, and tears now streamed down her face. “Go away!” she shouted finally. “Let me in!” it screamed in response. “Leave me alone!” she cried. The voice and the knocking echoed in her head, making her more nauseous than before. Reaching for the lock hesitantly, she sucked up her tears and held her breath, unlocking the door and throwing it open. Nothing was there. The tree stood in the yard unmoving, no wind. Nothing. She shut the door, shaking in fear. With the click of the lock, the room grew cold. Goose-bumps covered her skin. “Thank you for letting me in.” a voice whispered behind her.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, she's already been told twice.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Ed has spent all his days on the farm. It was the farm of his father and grandfather before him; long have they prospered from the fruits of this land. He has a wife and 3 beautiful children, all of whom live happily on the farm. Ed still manages to keep an active social life, and has lots of interesting friends. His best friend is Moe. As a young man, Ed had spent a few years living in the city for his studies. Moe lives in the city, and he knows Ed from College. One day, Moe came out to the farm to have lunch with his old friend. After lunch, he and Ed took a walk around the farm. They passed by the horses, the chickens, the pigs and finally they came to the cows. Ed looked at Moe, and he saw that he was focused intently on a single cow. "What's the matter, Moe?" he asked. "That," Moe said, "is one skinny cow."

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops