why was the 40 year old still a virgin? it doesnt know either.

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planned on writing you all an antijoke decided i wouldn't.

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Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am color-blind, I hate my life

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What do men and women have in common? They're both respected members of society, besides women.

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I like my women like I like my coffee, without a dick

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What's red and goes pop? A clip art of the word "Pop"

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What happened when 7 8 9? Six was afraid! HAHAHaha....ha.... wait, no. I told that wrong....

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you will now laugh.

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Dad: "Happy birthday, son! Let's go get a beer." Timmy: "But dad, birthdays are merely symbolic of how another year has gone by and how little we've grown. No matter how desperate we are, we hope that someday a better self will emerge, with each flicker of the candles on the cake, we know it's not to be, that for the rest of our sad, wretched pathetic lives, this is who we are to the bitter end. Inevitably, irrevocably; happy birthday? No such thing.” Timmy's mom had just died of cancer a few days ago. A friend walks in the door, not knowing Timmy's mom died just a few short days before his birthday. He screams, "Happy birthday!" TImmy: "Damn. I'm not going through this again."

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Mary had a little lamb, little lamb, little lamb Mary had a little lamb and the doctor was surprised

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms; *knock knock*, Who's There? Not Sally.

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what smells worse then shit Drew White

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What's brown and sticky? Poo.

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How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

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Paul and Steve, Siamese twins attached at the head, come to a fork in the road they are traveling. Paul wants to go left, while Steve wants to go right. They pause for a moment to figure out which direction would be the best choice for the both of them. They decide to go Paul's way, and as they continue to travel in silence, they try to imagine what life as a self-reliant individual would be like.

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if i had a nickel for every time iv typed an anti joke... i would have $0.15

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A guy trips a blind man.

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What do you call a homeless person with one leg? Rob.

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Why did the girl put on make-up and perfume? Because she was ugly and smelled bad.

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How do you make a model ugly? you shoot her in the face.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I thought I was ugly But then I met you

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why did the building fall down the terrorists came back

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Why do guys like Halloween? Martin Luther posted the 95 theses in 1517 on this day.

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what did the chinese guy say to the black guy? hello

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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