What did one Black man say to the other Black man before they ate? I hope you're hungry!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the cat say when you rub it's stomach? Nothing because felines don't have the needed vocal organs to speak, and probaly wouldn't know english do to the size of there brain.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses are red,violets are blue, im epileptic sdblkselhvefbed

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's better than winning the Paralympics? Having legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is worse than reading an anti-joke relatively similar to the other? Walking in your front yard and realizing a zombie is eating your dead grandmother.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A black man, a Jew, and a homosexual are at a bar together. They drink for a few hours, during which time they catch up with each other and share stories, as it has been some time since the three of them have seen each other. After they are done drinking, they call a friend, who comes to pick them up and take them home. What a fine example of drinking responsibly.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call an Irish man with no legs? Handicapped

thumb_up thumb_down +10

roses are red violets are blue i have alziemers what are we talking about again

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses are red, violets are blue, your hair smells nice, especially when woven into a sweater.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the kid fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms. Why couldn't he get up? Because he had no legs. Knock, Knock Who's there? Not that kid.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

sdasdadasdasd

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A man walks into a bar and says "Ow".

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the dog have 2 legs? he got cut in half.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what do you call a group of people who are systematiclly ruining a once well run family football club? steve kean , the venkys, and there advisors

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A man walks into a bakery and buys a doughnut. He then starts to drive home when he realised that he'd forgoten to eat the doughtnut and has to returne to do so.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

hi corey

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because she's being held hostage against her will.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What are pirate movies rated ? P.g 13 for violence and coarse language.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the cop say to the people watching the house fire? All right nothing to see here jokes over

thumb_up thumb_down +8

no pen = no studying no studying = bad grades bad grades = no job no job = no money no money = no food no food = death DON'T LOSE YOUR PEN

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What does it smell like, what does it feel like, do you like it? Yes

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why can't George Washington sit up straight? He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Good question, probably because I cannot get enough focus to "put a spell" on anyone because of my allergy, I use "autocast" for the rest. "Put a spell" I have not heard that since I was 14, that's really oldschool, and kinda geeky, back then it was code talk... Which is also geeky unless it actually serves a good purpose. AAAND... I served my mandatory time in the army as a minesweeper, we got attacked by fucking allies because of a... Yeah, I killed, people on our same team, still bad people, they offed about everybody else until I showed up, long story short, yeah I offed four of them, but that's like ten years ago.. My turn, you really got a crush on me dont you?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops