A family's house was possessed by ghosts causing them great fear and discomfort. Who are they gonna call? A real estate agent.

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After the haitian revolution, Haiti lived happily ever after, Until god smited them with a devastating natural disaster

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Do dead Elves know it's Xmas ?

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A neutron goes into a bar and asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?" The bartender, millions of times larger than the infinitesimally small subatomic particle, does not hear his question and so does not reply.

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Give a man a fish, feed him for a week. Teach a man to fish, he'll starve to death. Provide this man a fishing rod, and now finally you're doing something helpful.

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Fox News.

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Who is the worst teacher ever? Mrs. Thompson

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Nicolas Cage's acting.

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Michael Brown

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whats used in the kitchen and hurts like fuck? a cheese-grater dildo

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roses are red violets are blue bannas are yellow so is my wife

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A donkey walks into a supermarket and asks the cashier "Where are the potatoes?" The cashier replies "aisle 3" The donkey goes to aisle 3 And there are no potatoes

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.ellipsis { text-overflow: ellipsis; /* Required for text-overflow to do anything */ white-space: nowrap; overflow: hidden; }

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How do you stop a bus? Press the brakes

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What goes in dry, comes out wet and pleases two people. A teabag, you pervert.

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Q: How does a chicken get to work? A: A chicken does not go to work. Chickens can not legally be employed for any position in any country as they are chickens, are not human, and do not posses any prerequisites required to be hired for any existing employable position.

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What's brown, dirty, and smells like feces? Feces

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Q: what's the difference between a human and a gorilla? A: they can both talk, apart from the gorilla

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Communism, Capitalism and an Irish man walk into a bar. Communism says, “I’ll buy the drinks but I require your complete obedient consent.” Capitalism says, “No I’ll buy the drinks but I require that you pay me back with interest” and the Irish man says “No I… I don’t feel very well at all… Oh shite I’ve got the bloody runs!” He then proceeds to shit myself.

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Wow did you see stevie wonder's new house. neither has he

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Q.If you are European in the bathroom, what are you in the kitchen? A. A woman.

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot, you f***ing racist.

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Knock, Knock Come in

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Why did the chicken sneeze? Because someone put pepper on its nose.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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