Why did the man have a curiously-shaped scar on his cheek? He had been mauled by an owl as a child.

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A priest walks past a mailbox with the number 666 on it. Nothing happens, because it is an ordinary mailbox.

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What did the widow get for her birthday? Nothing from her husband.

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What did one cow say to the other cow? nothing cows cant talk. They did however, exchange glances while chewing grass next to each other.

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Who likes to be fisted? Sock puppets.

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Chuck Norris walks into a bank. There is a long line to get to the teller. Chuck Norris waits patiently in line.

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What's the difference between a plane and a Muslim dentist? A plane hasn't dedicated its life to the study of dentistry

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r jerks n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

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Roses are red violets are blue, he is for me and not for you, he's too ugly you can have him

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Ask if I'm a aardvark. Are you a aardvark? Yes.

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A Mexican, an Asian, a black guy, a white guy, a Jew, and a hispanic............... i forgot.

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I share two rooms with my mother.

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Bear walks into bar and says to eagle may I have a................... drink eagle says why the long pause hohahahohahahohaha

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Whats big red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater.

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Justin Bieber is a good singer.

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How do you unclog a toilet? You call a plumber.

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Whats worse than a Jew Ben rike

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i'm funny

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Q: how many oxen does it take to row up the empire state building in half of a green canoe under the purple sun while eating a dead moose with no arms? A: Purple, because snakes have no elbows.

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how do u know when your in west virginia? when the houses have more wheels than the cars

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Q, whats worst then being trapped in a house with a ghost. A, being trapped in a house with thirteen ghosts.

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Q- Who is the life of the party? A- hannah schane

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Neither does he.

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Michael Jackson walks into a daycare center.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops