Whats worse than an offended chicken walking around with a squirrel stapled to its back? A crusty old man with hepatitis peeing on 10 babies.

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to hit with a sledgehammer, the other one's a watermelon.

a man is bussy at work, when he gets called by his doctor. YOUR WIFE IS HAVING A BABY! the doctor yells. so the man runs to his car, drives home like a madman, and arrives home with his doctor holding the newborn in his arms. "congratulations" the doctor says "it's a boy" the man takes the baby in his arms and says: "but, this child is black!" his wife cheated on him and the familly breaks appart

Women.

Why didn't Jeffrey become a butler? He did become a butler.

Why did the teenager cross the road? To get an abortion.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This doesnt rhyme, Microwave.

What did the young boy get His dad for fathers day? Nothing, his dad died from a very aggresive cancer

Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Biting into your dog and finding a worm.

Why is 6 afriad of 7? because 7 killed 8 with a pistol and is now on a killing spree.

Q. What does a blonde and beer bottles have in common? A. Nothing. Blonde is a hair color and beer bottles are inanimate objects used to contain various brands of beer.

Kid: mom what happens when grandpa farts? Mom: well son... Everyone leaves the room

What's neon green and has 69 legs? Nothing that I know of, but it would be an interesting creature

Why did the bear turn red? Because he was emBEARessed. Nah just kidding, a hunter shot him.

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They took away privileges that she normally would have had had she not misbehaved.

What did the avocado say to the person? I can't talk

a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

Why do African-American people like fried chicken and watermelon? Because they are delicious food items.

What's the difference between a Cadillac and a pile of dead babies? My wife didn't cheat on me in a pile of dead babies.

Libyans stage a protest. They get massacred.

girl: why do you love me? boy: i don't.

What did the blonde say to the man when he asked her what time it was? 6:34 pm

Roses are black Violets are black Im Helen Keller WWWHHAATTTTT!?!?

Yo momma's so fat, she had a heart attack and is currently hospitalized.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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