What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? A Boy Scout comes home from camp.

The skeleton walks into a bar. Everyone is confused and leaves.

What should you do if you come across a slut with a fork up her @ss and a gun in her hand? Do not look at her and walk away.

How many penises is one metric butt-load. Oh God I hope you don't know the answer.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing

Knock knock Who's there? A penguin A penguin who? Just kidding, a penguin could never survive in this climate, I'm mark and was wondering if I could give you an estimate on some new siding

What did the table say to the human? Nothing, tables don't talk.

A chronic hemophiliac walks into a bar. He cuts his leg and bleeds to death.

John - hey do you have tickets to see Oasis? Sam - No I bought green day tickets intead John then proceeds to violently masturbate. Sam at first feels uncomfortable, then shits all over John and joins in.

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Why weren't there any black people at the book sale? Black people don't read.

why did the cow die because she ate poisoned apple pie

What did the man with the knife say to the ostrich? Run or I'll stab you!

What did the guy who killed Osama Bin Laden say? Burn!

what do you call some one with no arms and no legs? names.

A black and a mexican jump off a building, What a tragedy...

Your mums a penis joke.

Roses are red violets are blue you have cancer......

What's yellow and lays in a tree? Tweety the Whore

What did the boy say to the ghost wearing a banana outfit? Holy crap! A ghost!

What kind of cheese doEs god like? Swiss cheese because it's holy!

Butt Sex.

A little boy and a pedafile are walking through the forest at night. The little boy says "I'm scared." The pedafile says "You're scared? I have to walk home alone."

An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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