A Christian walks in into a bar . . . mitzvah.

Why was the little girl crying? Her father has been abusing her and her mother for a year now.

donald................duck for president

Why was it true for sure? It was on wikipedia.

Your Moma so fat, she would roll down a hill.

Why did the chicken cross the road Because he was Pierre preasured by all you assholes Saying he already did it so now he feels like he Has to do it.

Why do penguins wash their clothes in tide? They don't. As artic-dwelling birds, they don't have access TV or magazines and as such, are impervious to influences via commercials and written advertisements. Also, obvious tuxedo jokes aside, they don't really wear clothes.

Q. How do you make an oil lamp turn off? A. Break it.

If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Regression.

One day, John ate some food. He quickly realized he had an upsetting feeling in his stomach, so he stopped eating food and used the restroom. Then he drew a picture.

what do the Holocaust and Jeff Dunham have in common? they're both hilarious

ME NAME IS JEFF

Jerry: Hey, do you smell that? It kinda smells like updog. Moe: What's updog?

Did the boy ever tell you how he died? Trick questions he's dead, deceased bodies can't talk.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? "Robin get in the car"

why did the man jump off the building? to commit suicide.

What does Spiderman do everyday? Aunt May

Roses are red, Violets are blue.

Terry Stockton wasn't really hit.

whats worse than school? Summer school

How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? Wanna go bike riding?

What does Tourettes Syndrome have in common with short term memory loss? I DON'T FREAKING REMEMBER.

melon

What happened to the man who jumped into a puddle? He contracted hypothermia due to the low temperatures of the water. He died the next day.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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