Yo mommas so fat they had to change 'one size fits all' to 'one size fits most'

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I love you, you live me. Now get the FUDGE out of the tree!!!

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I'm the rubber and you're the glue, whatever you say sends vibrations through the air that hit my eardrum and my brain interprets these vibrations as what your are saying.

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What's white and hides behind a tree? Shy milk.

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A Brunette walks in to the docters office and says" Docter it hurts when i poke my self." She then pokes her arm and screams in agony. Then She pokes her leg and screams in agony. The Docter says "Are you really a brunette'' She replys "no im a Blonde." Docter says " oh then you have broken your finger"

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Why did Charlie Sheen laugh at the TV? Because there happened to be a comedy on.

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what did batman say to robin before getting into the car? get in the car.

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What did the gay man say to the other gay man? Hey, we're both gay, let's have sex!

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What did the old lady say when she went to a restaurant? OH look at the price of this salad.

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Why did the blond play Russian roulette? She is very poor and needs the money so she can feed her son.

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You are so gay you frequently, and consentingly are sodomized by men and frivolously enjoy it.

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Why did the man get off the bus? Penis

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Why did the man mow his lawn without his shirt on? Because it was very hot out.

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So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

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What does a tree and a human have in common? They both fall if you chop them with an axe.

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What do you get when you sunflower? Vegan turtles.

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Whats worse than having a woman faking an orgasm? Having a guy fake one.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Knock-knock. Who's there? The Chicken.

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ive got a joke for you Nicki minajs ase

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How do you kill a baby quickly? The better question is why kill a baby quickly?

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Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? No.

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What did the two fire men say to each other whilst a house was burning? Well be better put that fire.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

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Racial Equality.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops