Q: Whats worse than a dead baby in a bag? A: Please just make my hamburger.

Yo momma's so fat, her lifespan is probably going to be very short and you will have to bury her soon.

What's big, blue, and eats rocks? A big blue rock eater.

Q. How do you get a black man out of a tree? A. You get a ladder and help him down

How do u know a black woman is pregnant? When she pulls out a tampon it has no cotton on it.

How you do stop a baby from swinging around on the clothesline? Hit it with a shovel.

*******A CELL JOKE******* Mommy Ribosome and Daddy Mitochondria are watching baby nucleus play around in the cytoplasm, when all the sudden baby nucleus falls down and breaks its cell wall. Mommy ribosome is like freaking out like, "OH NO< WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO WE NEED TO TAKE HER TO THE E.R.". Then Daddy Mitochondria says, "The smooth ER or the rough ER???"

what does a black guy and a chinease guy have is common? I don't know but it would be interesting to find out.

What is the defference between an apple and a banana? Horses, because vests have no sleeves.

roses are red violets are blue you think shes hot? how BLIND are you?

An enormous black man wearing a durag walks into a bar. Due to the diverse and friendly comminuty he lives in, nobody judges him on his race, ethnicity, or culture. He goes on to pursue his career in business and gets a Masters Degree in Business Administration. He get's a job as an IT Director for a very successful business and he marries a well educated woman. They have 2 kids, but one of them is diagnosed with "Ondine's Curse" and dies in it's sleep. Distressed, and mourning the death of his newborn son, he seeks help from his parents. Regardless of his parents comforting and loving attitude towards him, he goes into the inner city smoking and selling illegal drugs like crack. He even got into cocaine and marjuana. 4 and a half years later, he was about to attempt suicide, when he saw his only living son, whom he loved with all his heart, walk into the room with his teddybear. He just looked at him, and he looked back. Suddenly, the father started crying. Flashbacks started playing though his mind of his happy life he was steadily pursuing. "why me?" He constantly thought to himself. What did he do to deserve this? 7 years in the future. The father was diagnosed with terminal cancer. Right before his death, he asked to talk to his son. "Son, listen to me. Never try to comtemplate the world we live in, it's too spontaneous and insane to understand. This world can either give you bliss or depression. Nothing inbetween. And most people who make there way up to the top eventually will fall. What goes up must come down. Ha... I never thought I'd be talking to me own son giving him a silly lecture in a deathbed. But just look at me..."the father gets very muddled and disoriented* "...Son. They say most of us have a good reason to live. Well don't most of us have a good reason to die too?" Malik Cartwright died on March 22, 1999. His son went on to legally change his middle name to "Leek", after his father's nickname. He went on to get the same Master's Degree that his father received, and had kids of his own. The whereabouts of the mother are unknown.

What did the doctor say to the little boy? Pull down your pants and cough.

Q; Why to did the chef jump off of a cliff wearing an Elmo suit? A; Because he felt like it. It;s a free country

Knock Knock. Who's there? The IRS. You didn't pay your taxes so we have to take you to jail.

What do you call a black kid with a backpack? I don't know.

Wanna hear a joke..... Corey Jacobs Scrotum!

Why did 0 dislike 1? Because 1 made 0 feel like he was nothing

A priest, a rapist, and a pedophile walk into a bar. That was just the first person.

If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

So there was a blond, a brunette, and a red-head. They walked out of the salon very happy with their respective dye jobs.

What do you do when your internet goes down? You right click on the internet connection and try to fix the problem.

What did one Chinese man say to the other? ?????

ask me if im a fence are you a fence WALNUTS!

A man walks into a bar. What does he say? Ouch!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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