Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. It was a dead monkey.

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What did one homo say to the other? Well, the politically correct term is homosexual, and he didn't say anything because they've never met.

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How do you kill a Mexican? Rupture its vital organs like any other organism ,but murder is wrong and should not be done under any circumstance

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what did batman say to robin before he got in the batmobile get in the batmobile

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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knock knock Who's there? ... Hello?

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If a vegetarian only eats vegetables, then what does a humanitarian eat?

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had herpes.

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Why did the chicken stop in the middle of the road? To get to the other side.

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modern love

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what do you think when you see someone throw a man with no arms and legs into the ocean? chances of survival are minimal

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I have a black man in my family tree... He's still hanging there.

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good one jess !!

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why was the boy laying on the ground? he got shot in the head

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Minecraft.

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Q: What do you do when your friend tells you he murdered someone? A: Call the police.

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John - hey do you have tickets to see Oasis? Sam - No I bought green day tickets intead John then proceeds to violently masturbate. Sam at first feels uncomfortable, then shits all over John and joins in.

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wsedrtyujiKFKJKLEFL;LKJRG Blame the economy. Don't hit me, I'm a girl! EQUAL RIGHTS, EQUAL RIGHTS!

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A zen master walks up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything." The vendor says, "Sorry, we're out of relish." Then the zen master tells him, "Sir, I don't think you get the joke. As you can see by my long silk robes and fu manchu, I am clearly a zen master. And I have used a pun that would make you think I were asking for enlightenment from a hot dog." The vendor then says, "We don't take too kindly to wise guys here." And then the prick gets up and tosses me into the street!

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Why couldn't the blonde read the road map? Because she was blindfolded and tied up in the trunk.

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Needless to say,

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What's red and green and goes 100 mph? A fast car that's painted red and green...

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How do you know if there's an elephant in your fridge? The fridge is broken and the elephant has mauled your dog

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Your dad is so bald, that a various number of people compliment him on how well shaven his head is.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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