What did the duck get for Christmas. A potato. Not really it got nothing because it's a duck

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because he was hungry and mcdonalds was across the street

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Why did the black man go to school? So he could graduate with a degree and persue his life in medicine. He later goes on to get his P.H.D. He now supports his healthy family of 5 and living in Idaho, the state of the potato. He has a job as a doctor and is making more than $2M a year. Ha, didn't expect that now did ya.

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What's the worst part about being drunk? Your child.

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Why don't elephants eat bananas? Because they don't have opposable thumbs.

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Why did the Mexican man jump to the floor? He had a stroke.

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You know what's funny? A bucket full of dead babies. Do you know what's funnier? The last one is still alive and crying.

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Explain the term 'Standard of Living'? Not having sex with diseased and obese women.

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What do you call a dog with no arms and no legs. It doesn't matter what you call him he still won't come.

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Salad. It's green and so is The Hulk.

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What kind of jokes to dairy farmers tell? Corny jokes.

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Why did the woman fall off the skateboard? She hit a rock.

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what did the horse say after the man told him to have a good day? nothing, horses dont talk.(:

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Why did the world not end in 2012? Because the Mayans were drunks.

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Patient: Doctor, I've been having a problem, I can't remember anything. Doctor: Do you think you might have amnesia, a common memory problem. Patient: What Problem?

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Q: why do irish people like swimming A: because it's fun

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? The Batmobile only seats one, you'll have to take the bike Boy Wonder.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

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Whats brown and sticky? A peice of poo

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Why did the student fail his test? Because he has AIDS

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I farted!!!!! t'was smelly??????? I LIKE CRABS! #tomato problems

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, Therefore no one knew why his name was Fuzzy Wuzzy.

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hipsters

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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