Q. How much wood can a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A. Actually woodchucks can't chuck wood only beavers can

What do you call a man named Jimmy? Jimmy

Knock knock Who's there? Carrot Carrot who? Carrot in the tree house, cause it's orange.

Why did the lizard cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

Hey, so I know this guy who knows this guy,who knows this guy,who knows this guy,who knows this guy,who knows this guy,who knows this guy,who knows this guy,who knows this guy's cousin who's name is Mark.

A handicapp walks into a bar

Q - What do you call a hamburger without pickles? A - You call it a hamburger just without the pickles.

dur dur dur dur said the child born during an earthquake

Q: Why didn't the boy go to school? A: It was the weekend.

THE GAME

justin bieber

A boy has enough money to buy an xbox and a game, but when he reaches the store he is no longer able to buy an xbox and a game, how is this possible? He didnt really have enough money to buy an xbox and a game.

why couldn't the the black man get a job? because he doesn't posses the correct work ethic.

Want to hear the best joke? Your life :,( i think i hate you?

What is a black guy's favorite hobby? Stamp collecting.

Q: What did Robin Williams say to the young boy? A: Nothing, He is dead

What do u call a black man playing a jumping sport? I don't know but it is totally normal.

Q: What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? A: Names

How many dead babies fit into a bathtub? 23

Ed has spent all his days on the farm. It was the farm of his father and grandfather before him; long have they prospered from the fruits of this land. He has a wife and 3 beautiful children, all of whom live happily on the farm. Ed still manages to keep an active social life, and has lots of interesting friends. His best friend is Moe. As a young man, Ed had spent a few years living in the city for his studies. Moe lives in the city, and he knows Ed from College. One day, Moe came out to the farm to have lunch with his old friend. After lunch, he and Ed took a walk around the farm. They passed by the horses, the chickens, the pigs and finally they came to the cows. Ed looked at Moe, and he saw that he was focused intently on a single cow. "What's the matter, Moe?" he asked. "That," Moe said, "is one skinny cow."

What did the kid with no arms get for christmas? No one knows he hasn't been able to open his presents yet.

What's the difference between peanut butter and jelly ? Among many things, one is made with peanut butter, the other with fruits.

So in Jimmy's school if u are misbehaving u are asked to get out of the room. Jimmy was in science, and he was throwing paper a bunch. Then his science teacher says, "Jimmy, do u wanna go out?" Jimmy replies "No thanks, I'm 14 and i have a girlfriend." That's how Jimmy got detention.

What's neon green and has 69 legs? Nothing that I know of, but it would be an interesting creature

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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