A baby seal walks into a club

A pig, a chicken, and a cow are born on 3 separate barns. They are raised by old men who subside off the grains of the field. When the animals mature, the farmers will butcher the pig, slaughter the chicken, and gut the cow. The farmer who raised the chicken may enjoy a few eggs first but the animals will all die eventually. Either of natural causes or more likely being butchered for profit. Cows make milk.

Knock Knock!! Who's There? No one, your being ding dong ditched!

Knock Knock Who's there? its the police mam your son has been killed by a hit and run driver, the driver was an alcohol

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A fat guy. - Louis

A little boy and a pedafile are walking through the forest at night. The little boy says "I'm scared." The pedafile says "You're scared? I have to walk home alone."

Why do blondes where pigtails? Because they look nice.

What do you call a black astronaut? It depends on what his name is.

How many women's right's leaders does it take to change a light bulb? None. They can't change anything.

how do you find will smith in the snow? with rescue dogs

black guy graduating high school

why is red the first color in the rainbow? I don't know go ask a scientist.

*knock knock* Who's there? *Gorilla* Gorilla who? *Gorillas don't hoot, owls hoot*

How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Someone else's.

What do you call a gay Mexican guy who is deaf, has no arms, no legs, and is bald? Whatever his name is.

whats the difference between a flamingo ? because the pyramid has a high cholesterol

What do you call a black man at the head of the U.S.? A mistake.

Why does Michael j. Fox make the best milkshakes? He uses the finest ingredients

Why do animals on the side of the road stink? Well they don't, you just think they do when in reality all it is, is there insides rottening From prevous days of exposen of the air now as far as I know all the little baby squrriel Wanted was it get his nuts in the road and it bring back to his starving family counting on him to bring Food to the tree next thing you know a soccer mom's van ran the poor baby squirrel over. Now me knowing this squirrel myself (don't ask me how) he wanted to go out in style you know get ran over by a mustang or a lambo not some bitch ass mini van with sliding doors and a dvd player convinit for the kids to watch spongebob.... man I bet that squrriel was pissed!

What's black and very long? The line-up at KFC.

i heard something so funny it made me crap my pants you were a mistake

Your momma's so dumb, she had to spend an extra hour studying for her mathematics test.

A blonde sits down in first class on a flight to Miami. That's because she had a ticket for the seat.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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