Why does my ass hurt I played gmod with a blackpeople

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Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas? There is no Santa Claus.

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What did the black man say to the man from Kyrgyzstan? I've never heard of your country before.

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What do you call a chicken with it's head chopped off. A decapitated chicken.

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A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim walk into a bar. I don't know what happens next, I got the fuck out of there before shit went down

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What's brown, liquid and bad for your health in large doses? Did you guess: Coca Cola? Soda? Beer? Pepsi? Wrong. It's beer. Did this Anti-joke sound pretentious? Don't worry, you're not the only one.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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Q. Why can’t a teacher lift weights? A. Because, most teachers are women and most women do not enjoy It.

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Q: Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? A: Because he's dead.

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What's white and hides behind a tree? Shy milk.

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Yo mama so fat, she was accepted to a clinical trial for treatment of morbid obesity in middle-aged women.

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Why did Charlie Sheen laugh at the TV? Because there happened to be a comedy on.

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What's the worst part about seeing a dead baby on the beach? The crushing sadness.

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I've got a joke for you. The people writing these jokes. Thats a joke.

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My doctor recommended I take anger management classes. That really pisses me off.

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What's the square root of four? Two.

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart... but the very next day your body rejected the transplant and you died.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm color blind.

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This is my firstever post so I wanted to make it very specialand have it really mean something, then I though fark that for a joke

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Racial Equality.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Regardless of the number of dead babies present, painting a house will require at least one living baby.

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Those days where everything goes wrong, and you think to yourself "I just gotta do whats right here"... ...Sigh... 2. DO YOU KNOW WHY I HATE YOU SO MUCH? BECAUSE I HATE YOU! (Blame is on me, love and hate are not opposites, send me a copy of your book, and ill rip it out for you)

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What's the difference between a monkey wrench and a snow cone? A lot.

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If file gives you melons, you might be dyslexic

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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