What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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How many black people does it take to change a light bulb. One, of course. Assuming he/she does not have any physical or mental handicaps.

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Why did the Dr love drop hit guitar? Because a bear walked into a bar and killed everyone in there including dr love and was then shot to death by police and animal control.

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Knock knock Who's There? Idk, who the **** names their kid There?

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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What do all of these jokes have in common? They're not funny. You see, the definition of an anti-joke is a "type of indirect humor that involves the joke-teller delivering something which is deliberately not funny, or lacking in intrinsic meaning. The audience is expecting something humorous, and when this does not happen, the irony itself is of comedic value." As this is a page full of anti-jokes, we know to expect the unfunny - thus robbing us of the experience of an anti-joke.

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What do you get when you sunflower? Vegan turtles.

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One white male lives in a city with all blacks. He puts up with gang violence nearly every day.

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Barack Obama.

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2 women were sitting quietly.

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Q:What's red and fluffy? A: A blue rock, if blue were red and rocks were fluffy

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- I shot the sheriff! - You murderer

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A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim walk into a bar. I don't know what happens next, I got the fuck out of there before shit went down

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Izzy and Zayn Malick got married. Then Zayn asked for a divorce due to their age difference..

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A man walks into a bar, has a few drinks and spots a nice looking lady He then follows her home and molestes her child.

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What's worse than getting a jigsaw puzzle for your birthday? Slavery

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's me Ok, come in (the knockers voice was familiar enough that giving a name would have been out of place)

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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How do you fit 100 babies in a bucket? put them in a blender. How do you get them out? potato chips.

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? Hello, I'm here to deliver your groceries. Ok thank you, please leave them by the front door.

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I love you, you live me. Now get the FUDGE out of the tree!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he happened to be walking in that general direction.

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Why did Charlie Sheen laugh at the TV? Because there happened to be a comedy on.

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What did the blind kid get for Christmas? A collection of braile children's reading books.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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