Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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What do you call an Arab on a plane? A passenger, you racist!

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No, we got to speak now, or you know, never.

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In Soviet Russia, millions of innocents died due to the oppression.

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Chuck Norris walks into a bank. There is a long line to get to the teller. Chuck Norris waits patiently in line.

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No really, try this: You: Say "knock, knock" Your friend: OK, knock knock You: Who's there? Your friend: ...... [this awkward pause makes evident the fact that it has now dawned on your friend that he has to generate content for a joke that he wasn't telling in the first place]

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Q: What is wrong on many different levels? A: Rape on an elevator.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Someone threw birdseed.

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What's the difference between George Michael and a microwave oven? One is a human being and the other is a resourceful appliance.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van

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A straight guy, a straight girl and a bisexual guy walk into a bar. The bisexual guy is twice as likely to find a partner from a purely statistical point of view.

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Your time.

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Tic tac toe. You were adopted.

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Q: whats the fastest way to a woman's heart? A: A knife to the ribs...

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How do you get three Canadians out of a pool? Say "Hey guys time to get out of the pool."

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ROSES ARE RED WATCHES ARE GOLD GET ON YOUR KNEES AND DO WHAT YOUR TOLD

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How do you make a plumber sad? Kill his family.

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Q: What's worse than being forced to eat your veggies? A: Being forced to kill your parents with a carrot.

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What do a fish, a can of asparagus, a spool of thread, and a car tire have in common? Nothing.

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say this really fast dick chick, chick, dick, dick chick,chick dick, dick chick if you cant like it

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why did the lesbians shop at modell's? because they thought the store had reasonable prices and considerable discounts

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Another cat joke. You gotta be kitten me.

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if life gives you lemonnde your probally halusinating

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? playing spin the bottle with your mom

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops