Why did the milkman die? Because everyone dies.

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you: guess what somebody: what? you: you have cancer

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Why does Eli Manning play for the Giants? Because he is huge.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of a lake? Dead.

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what's worse than getting a paper cut? Hiroshima

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An old couple walks up to me and says, "can you take our picture? It's our 50th anniversary." I reply, "sure." Then I pull the man to the side and ask, "how do you make a relationship last so long? I can't make one last 50 days let alone years." He leans in and says, "cheat"

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How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

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What's the difference between jam and jelly? Jam is slightly more viscous and may contain bits of fruit.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? playing spin the bottle with your mom

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Mac: Hi, I'm a Mac! PC: And I'm a PC. Steve Jobs died.

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guys ive got a TANK under my house a septic tank

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Why did the gorilla fall on the ground Because it was dead

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There is a man with the surname of Westmoreland. This is a terrible name.

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Why didn't Steve finish his homework? He didn't want to.

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So i can type anything in this box and it shows up on the website?

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What's black and white and red all over? Two nuns in a chainsaw fight.

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What did the bear say to the mouse? Roar.

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Whats worse than a Jew Ben rike

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69

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What do you call a hispanic and black man flying a plane? A pilot and his co-pilot.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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How did the girl get hit by a car? Better question, How did the car get in the kitchen?

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If you and Chuck Norris have five dollars you both have the same amount of money.

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Why Was Did Jill Cross The Road? She Needed To Get To Work.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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