What do a blond and a jar of marmalade have in common? Nothing, they are completely different.

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A black guy walks into a bar... *3 hours later* He walks out...

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What magical power enables Spongebob to talk? There is no magical power. he is a cartoon therefore making him be able to anything in anyone's wild dreams.

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Why do women wear deodorant and makeup? Because they're ugly and they stink.

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Why did the skeleton stay home from the party He was buried in a coffin underground and, as a matter of fact, wasn't actually invited

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A little boy and a pedafile are walking through the forest at night. The little boy says "I'm scared." The pedafile says "You're scared? I have to walk home alone."

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Why did i write this joke knowing i wont get published? I don't know.

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roses are black violets are black im blind

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Q:If an apple and an orange had a politicial debate, what would it concern? A:Nothing important.

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Who's there? Knock Knock.

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Jimmy was skipping in the park one day when a young boy stopped him. "Hello there, would you like to be friends? We can go behind the old oak tree and play soccer!" asked the boy. "Ok!" replied Jimmy, and they went off together to play. The so-called 'young boy' was actually a wanted midget rapist. Jimmy was brutally raped and filmed. The film was later uploaded onto the internet where it blew up in a matter of weeks. Jimmy had to move schools 6 times and had to go to counselling every week. He finds it hard making friends and later went on to become a heavy cocaine addict.

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There were once three bears who lived in a cottage in the forest. They left to go to the market one day. While they were gone a blonde girl walked into their cabin. Meanwhile at the market, everyone was freaking out that there were bears there.

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What do you call a snail driving a boat? An accident waiting to happen.

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Why is Keven's name spelled with an E Because his parents are black.

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Guy 1: What the shit is that car? Guy 2: Its not a car. It's an alfa romeo

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. These are facts. Good day.

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hit the thumbs down button

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Knock knock Who's there My BUTTCRACK

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How do you kill a retard You give em a kinfe and ask who's special

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead

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Once upon a time there was a cat named Martin. He died.

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A man walks into a bar. He is rushed to the hospital due to a large aneurysm that has burst in his brain because he walked into the bar.

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what did the chicken cross the road? because its a chicken

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops