Why did the man get fired? Because he had cancer

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What did the American say to the Russian? Hello, but the Russian did not understand

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Whats worse than finding out that your family is dead? finding a worm in your apple

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The grass is always greener on the side that uses manure and fertilizer daily.

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Whats fuzzy and greenand if it falls from a tree it will kill you? A pool table.

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What's something 9/10 people enjoy? A gang rape.

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Q: what did a kid in harlem get for christmas? A: nothing he got shot

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What do you call a blind fish? Amblyopsidae.

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Is this where I type the joke?

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whats black and white and slides on its belly a penguin

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Why did the women call 911 on her 12 year old son? Because he was schizophrenic and attempting to commit suicide by hanging himself.

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Why did the chicken kross the road? It didn't because it was a highway and it got hit by a bus.

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Why could'nt the boy eat peanuts? Because if he did he would proceed to have an allergic reaction, his throat would swell up, he would go into analeptic shock and die.

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Why did the black man go to the gym? Because he was severely fat and would live a short life if he didn't lose weight.

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Why did the black man begin to cry when his friend aimed a gun at a watermelon? Because if he were to shoot it would be a waste of perfectly good food.

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Why wasn't my T.V. on? Because I didn't have a remote.

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my friend is gay hes gay

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What did the little boy want to be when he grew up? Dead.

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Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she's a women. Why can't Stephen Hawking speak freely with his voice? Because he's autistic.

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Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He calls the right number.

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why was 6 afraid of 7?

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Yo mama so fat, that when she wore a blue swimsuit to the beach and swam, the Blue Whales started sing, "WE ARE FAAMILY...EVEN THOUGH UR BUGGER THAN ME!!!"

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Why did the black man go to school? So he could graduate with a degree and persue his life in medicine. He later goes on to get his P.H.D. He now supports his healthy family of 5 and living in Idaho, the state of the potato. He has a job as a doctor and is making more than $2M a year. Ha, didn't expect that now did ya.

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what do you get when a bear and a man mix a really pissed off bear and a dead man

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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