Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? No.

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One white male lives in a city with all blacks. He puts up with gang violence nearly every day.

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What did the two fire men say to each other whilst a house was burning? Well be better put that fire.

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9/11

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Barack Obama.

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ON THE SEVENTH DAY OF JUNE, THURSDAY HAPPENED!!!! -ilikecrepes97

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What did the catholic priest say to the little boy? Nothing sexual, that kind of behavior isn't as widespread as people think.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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national song of the mute person? 5 minutes of silence please

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What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? The hooker is a human being whereas the onion is a vegetable.

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A man violently rapes a small child. Unfortunately the child has aids and gives them to the man.

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Why are blondes stupid? They are not. Its just in America society has been given that impression through inaccurate and crude jokes.

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Why i Hate people. They are alive. The are breathing. The are near me.

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How do you kill a baby quickly? The better question is why kill a baby quickly?

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Roses are red Violets are blue (not really) I have Alzheimer's Cheese on toast

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what is small and is not fair Mitt Romneys tax rate

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A Brunette walks in to the docters office and says" Docter it hurts when i poke my self." She then pokes her arm and screams in agony. Then She pokes her leg and screams in agony. The Docter says "Are you really a brunette'' She replys "no im a Blonde." Docter says " oh then you have broken your finger"

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What's the worst part about seeing a dead baby on the beach? The crushing sadness.

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What did the gay man say to the other gay man? Hey, we're both gay, let's have sex!

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Why does a squid have 8 legs? It doesn't, it has 8 tentacles!

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Why did the man fall off the swing? he got hit in the back of the head with a shovel.

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What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? My ass

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops