Q: What did the blonde woman say? A: My hair is blonde

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, My Heart Skips A Beat, When I Think Of You! :D

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Why are spanish people good at soccer? Hard work and a long-life time comitment

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Two men drove their car of a cliff. They died.

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Boy: If you didn't have feet, would you wear socks? Girl: No. Boy: Then why do you wear a bra?

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I lost my tractor.

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A man walks into a bar. It was a metal bar. He cracked his skull and died in the hospital shorty afterward.

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What has two legs, takes away your money, and causes depression? A Democrat.

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What's the difference between peanut butter and jelly ? Among many things, one is made with peanut butter, the other with fruits.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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Your mother called last night. She wants her recipe back.

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No, I do not have the will, I have a family now, I make a living writing fiction, and well, play a small role in keeping not national, but worldwide stability in such things as the economics. The thing is, that you are renegades, you do not break the law, but you like to do things your own way, that gets you enemies among the so called "paragons" in the face of society and media. Its just like back in the days, if CIA, The Feds, Interpol and such are known as the "Paragons of civilization" or "the good guys" if you prefer, they can point towards you guys, and say "these are evil", and then nothing can stop them.

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who is the wildest wild one? matt daly

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When life gives you melons, you're dyslexic.

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What is black and white and red all over? A half eaten zebra carcass.

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Q: What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? A: A funeral.

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What is the difference between a firework and a dog? One is funny to blow up and the other one is pretty lights

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A blind man walks into a bar. He didn't know there was a step and tripped loudly. Other bargoers saw this and helped him up, he was given a beer on the house.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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if life gives you lemons, you have some lemons

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What do you call a kid with cancer? screwed

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if a fat man in a red suit puts you in a bag at night. its not santa your getting raped

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Why don't women need watches? Because most people carry cell phones that tells them the time making watches redundant and obsolete.

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What's worse than genital warts? Herpes. You can get rid of warts

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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