Why did the Jewish man dive into the street to pick up a penny? He was Tevye, a character from the famous play Fiddler on the Roof and pennies are valuable and rare in Tsarist Russia in 1905.

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What do you call it when you lend money to a bison? Unitelligent, because bison do not have the ability to purchase things with money so it will most likely just eat the money.

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A man walks into his doctor's office He says: ''Doctor, I have said goodbeye to my family and friends and I have decided to take the pills you offered me and die peacefully in my sleep, I won't suffer any longer from my disease''. The doctor answers: ''You are in luck, we still have a few of them left''

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First person: Knock, knock. Second person: Who's there? First person: You know. Second person: 'You know' who? First person: O.O LORD VOLDEMORT!

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Q: what animal didnt get on Noah's ark in pairs? A: worms. they got on in apples.

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A list of comebacks: Hows ur face nancy grace ur mom ur face ur moms face take it to my butt, cuz ur the only one that gives a crap

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Tell you something funny.

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Whats worse than finding out that your family is dead? finding a worm in your apple

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Why did the bunny cross the road? It didn't, It was hit by a truck...

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why did the one handed man cross the road? to get to the secondhand shop.

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What did the white man say to the group of mexicans when a golf ball was coming toward them? 4!

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everyone. - Blake Woodman

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How many watermelons did the black man have? Too many to count, he was a farmer and his primary crop was watermelons.

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But one McDonalds Happy Meal for the price of two, and receive another McDonalds Happy meal absolutley free!

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Yo momma's so fat, her lifespan is probably going to be very short and you will have to bury her soon.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This poem makes no sense FIRETOE!!!

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IM SEXY AND I KNOW IT Chrysanthemums are pretty but toads and people are damn to horny

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whats dead and gone your nanas cat

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What's funny about the old man who got stabbed? Nothing... you're a sick person!

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Why did the fat guy sit on another guy? They were in a wrestling match.

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What is the biggest lie in the entire universe? I agree to the terms of service.

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roses are red, violets are red, a girl had her period in my garden.

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Q. What did tthe little kid say when the bully punched him? A. Ow.

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What did the boy with cancer get for christmas Nothing he didnt live that long

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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