What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells? Pregnant

Q: whats worse than a Muslim? A: a Jew

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Armando masturbated

How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Yarn

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple?

A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic with a family of four and is ruining his life. -Tag

What's the difference between a tomato and a rhinoceros? Neither of them can ride a bicycle.

what has 2 eyes but can't see... an asian

Bill: Knock, Knock. Sean: Who's there? Bill: It's your neighbor, Bill Walters, from across the street. Sean: Oh, hey Bill, how are you and Margie? Bill: Oh, I'm doing fine, but Margie just got out of the hospital for a broken arm. Sean: My gosh, what happened. Bill: She was just loading the Halloween decorations down from the attic while I wasn't home and fell. She's fine though; it was only a minor fracture. Sean: Well thank goodness she alright. Bill: Anyway, I came over to return those hedge clippers I borrowed from you last month. Sean: Oh, thank you. How did they work? Bill: Just great once I gave them a coat of oil. It was a big job... I haven't trimmed those bushes in three years. Sean: No problem, I almost never use them myself. Well I better get back to Jeanie...I'm helping her make dinner. Bill: Alright, Well thanks again.

knock knock whos there the game _______I LOST THE GAME_______

Why did the plane crash? -Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Q: Why did Sally fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Q: Why did the girl fall off the swing? R: Because she had no arms.

knock! knock! whos there? doctor doctor who? no Doctor Brown, you have cancer

What do you call a comedian who can;t make people laugh? A bad comedian.

Why was the first name of the boy 'Price'? His parents were Hamsters.

why'd the baby cross the road it was stapled to the chicken

Did you hear about the black guy who got into college? Actually, there are nearly 10,00 African Americans who get accepted into college every year. This specific black male is notable because of his stellar grades and his activity in his community.

What happened when the man rubbed the magical lamp? Nothing.

Why did the blonde have the biggest tits in 3rd grade? She's 21

Not an anti-joke, but an anti-pick-up-line: How much does a polar bear weight? Not as much as you!

What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the the wheels.

Why was Sally crying She got a high five In the face With a chair

How do you get a blonde to break a nail? Smash her finger with a wrench.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...