A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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What is purple and crawls? A wounded grape.

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A man on crutches walked across the road. Suddenly he fell and sprained his foot. He was pleased that he was carrying crutches.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Look at that bitches asss!!

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Four homosexuals walk into a bar. They notice that there's only one stool left at the bar itself. They sat at a table with four chairs. They had a delightful time.

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In Soviet Russia, millions of innocents died due to the oppression.

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Roses are red Violets are blue The sky is blue too

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The Braves win the N.L. east

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Why did a Monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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How do you do you cure cancer? Very carefully.

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Why do jewish women like to get their sons circumcised? They like anything 25% off.

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How do you get three Canadians out of a pool? Say "Hey guys time to get out of the pool."

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What do Alexander the Great and Kermit the Frog have in common? Their middle name.

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Q: What time do you see a Chinese dentist? A: Never because China has a flawed healthcare system due to overpopulation. It is a sad and sobering reality of the plight of the Chinese citizens.

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Jimmy went to a bar, to see a stand up comedian, he heard the standup comedian tell a funny joke, so after the show, he went home and told his wife the joke and after that he said, i made that up, im funny arent i, the wife seemed shifty, so she googled the joke and found the stand up comedians joke, giggled and then proceeded to continue back angrily to Jimmy, because he just did the wrong thing, she slapped Jimmy in the face, divorced Jimmy and killed his 3 children because Jimmy plagurised, and plagurism is illegal, and now Jimmy has no children, and a red mark on his cheek and knows he did the wrong thing don't smoke kids

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Wanna here a joke? Feminism.

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Mmmmmmmmbutch

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You Know Wats Funny? Jokes....

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A priest walks past a mailbox with the number 666 on it. Nothing happens, because it is an ordinary mailbox.

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What smells like peanut butter but looks like a penis? A penis, I lied about the peanut butter.

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Why does the Muslim go to Hollywood? Because he is gifted in acting. He believes Hollywood will give him a wider range of career opportunities.

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Why was the baby ant confused? Because his uncles were ants

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A man walks into a bar. He has suffered from a concussion and is now in the emergency room.

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How many dead jews can you fit in a hole? Ask hitler.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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