Knock Knock Who's there? Luke Futie

Q: How many years does it take for a deer to grow into a moose? A: 7

Wanna hear a joke? Joe Jonas.

Why did the man not go to church? He was an atheist.

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear made her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

Your social life.

Q: What is that white stuff in chicken shit? A: Thats chicken shit too

a dinosaur with a large clown hat is walking down the street when he is confronted by an obese monkey human with red hair. I set this up for a good pun, but the one i have is potatoes.

An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

What does rainbow stand for? Rick Astley Is Nesting By Our Window to harass us

The WNBA.

A black man walks into a bar and says, "ouch."

Patients: Whats happening doctor Doctor: I am afraid you all have tested positive Patients: Oh No!!! Doctor: Positive for being great friends all these years! Patients: Oh Doctor you are so.... Doctor: ASWELL AS AIDS!!!

Your momma's so dumb, she had to spend an extra hour studying for her mathematics test.

What'f funny and has 8 wheels? The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels

press Ctrl and F4 on ur key pad

knock knock who's there i lost my wallet my nan died

What do you get when you cross a zebra and a panda? Well, pandas are almost extinct. I guess they gave up and started goin' with zebras.

Your mother is so stupid, she is unable to uphold a steady job and cannot support you financially.

Why did the child get hit by a bus? He was blind.

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

Why did the chicken cross the road? because the walk sign said to

Why was the 45 year old man crying? He shit his pants.

Charlie Sheen walks into a bar... Every morning, and stays until it closes... [credit gilbert gottfried]

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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