what is faster than a cheetah? i dont know what? if i knew why would i be asking..

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Why did the girl throw butter out the window? She was suffering from an epileptic seizure.

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Why did the man pick the flower? Because he didn't like flowers.

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What did the priest say to the rabbi ? I'm gay.

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Yo mama so stupid she tried to drown a dog and was quite successful at it. Know she serves a death sentence.

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Two men and a woman walk into a bar. They are all viciously murdered by a serial killer, who as he walks out, runs into a pole and suffers from a concussion, which he later dies from.

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What's brown and sticky? Human excrement.

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A tiger walks into a bar. Clearly there is something wrong with animal control.

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What's worse than listening to Justin Beiber? Getting hit by a train.

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9/11

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2 women were sitting quietly.

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Want to hear the best joke ever? Me too.

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Why does a squid have 8 legs? It doesn't, it has 8 tentacles!

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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What did the gay logger do to the tree with a hole in it? Cut it down.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm color blind.

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what is the difference between having sex and having sex on my period ..... i have something to drink when i have sex on my period

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Why didn't Joe's toaster work anymore? Because he dropped it into the bathtub with him.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Regardless of the number of dead babies present, painting a house will require at least one living baby.

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What did the blind kid get for Christmas? A collection of braile children's reading books.

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Why did the Dr love drop hit guitar? Because a bear walked into a bar and killed everyone in there including dr love and was then shot to death by police and animal control.

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A cruise ship took sail. It was about a mile out into the water already. The blonde had missed the ship when it set sail. She was only capable of swimming a mile. She swam a half a mile out after the ship, and then turned around. She then later died due to a severe case of hypothermia due to the temperatures of the water for long periods of time.

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Why did the blonde buy a hotdog? She didn't. She has chronic anorexia.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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