Why was the man called Big Larry? His name was Larry and he was morbidly obese.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the retard say to the other retard? *(incoherent gibberish)*

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the Kitty stop meowing? Because its dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Patients: Whats happening doctor Doctor: I am afraid you all have tested positive Patients: Oh No!!! Doctor: Positive for being great friends all these years! Patients: Oh Doctor you are so.... Doctor: ASWELL AS AIDS!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. Bob has been missing since Friday.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

You know what's funny? A bucket full of dead babies. Do you know what's funnier? The last one is still alive and crying.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Patient: Doctor, I've been having a problem, I can't remember anything. Doctor: Do you think you might have amnesia, a common memory problem. Patient: What Problem?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the chicken cross the road? because the walk sign said to

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A pig, a chicken, and a cow are born on 3 separate barns. They are raised by old men who subside off the grains of the field. When the animals mature, the farmers will butcher the pig, slaughter the chicken, and gut the cow. The farmer who raised the chicken may enjoy a few eggs first but the animals will all die eventually. Either of natural causes or more likely being butchered for profit. Cows make milk.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the kid tell yo mama jokes to insult other kids? His mom had just committed suicide due to depression caused by the kid's bad habits.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Two buissness men had a meeting at 12:00 they had there meeting at 12:00 and left back to there normal life.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Chuck Norris is an average human being!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

how do you make a plumber cry kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: How many years does it take for a deer to grow into a moose? A: 7

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a black man with a wooden leg? A veteran.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q:How did the blonde commit suicide? A: She didn't, she sought help and was able to live a very happy life with a beautiful family in a nice suburb outside of Cincinnati.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's red and green and goes 100 mph? A fast car that's painted red and green...

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what do you call a grown man who sticks food up his nose? retarded

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's the best joke in the world? This one.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Charlie Sheen walks into a bar... Every morning, and stays until it closes... [credit gilbert gottfried]

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q:Why did the chicken cross the road A:He didn't he was tortured then killed and turned into a sandwich that you can buy for the price of $1.00

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops