Two fish were in a tank one said...."ill drive!"

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Why did the pig walk into the bar Because he was thirsty

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting Cow. Interrupting Cow who? Interrupting Cow Jones.

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The man who invented the teleprompter has died at the age of 91. When President Obama heard the news, he was speechless.

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A squirrel and an owl are sitting in a tree. A farmers walks by underneath, and the squirrel turns to the owl and says nothing, because squirrels can't talk and neither can owls. Then the owl eats the squirrel because it is a bird of prey.

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What is the difference between your mom and a cow? One is a 1,500 pound beast, and one is a human being.

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy, but heres my penis, so suck it baby.

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What happened when the cow jumped over the barbed wire fence? Hopefully it made it over without lacerating its underbelly, thus causing fatal bleeding.

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What starts with P and ends in ORN? Porn.

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Why does the groom wear a black tux? Because he knows a funeral when he sees one.

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Why did the white kids accept Morgan Freeman as a kid? All of his school-mates looked up to him

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raping black women

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I'm innocent its all Taggart he's the one instigating.

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why did the pinapple walk the plank? to eat a cat because cheese say people!

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modern love

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Why wasn't there an elevator in the rainforest? The rainforest is not capable of managing an elevator because an elevator does in fact require an energy source which is also not capable in a rainforest. The rainforest is filled with animals and is not filled with humans which would make having an elevator in the rainforest useless because the main use of an elevator is to transport humans. The animals in the rainforest would not be able to operate the elevator because using an elevator for them would be advance while humans using elevators is second nature.

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What do the words lightbulb and lightweight have in common? The word light is in both words. Other than that absolutely nothing.

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

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A: Who are you? B: A random guy who walked into your house A: Oh sorry, I keep forgetting your name.

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What do you call a man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk? A man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk.

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What time is it when grandpa sits ontop of a telephone pole and throws pineapples at people? Time to go to a nursing home

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why did the dog jump into the pool? because the cat was chasing him

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Knock Knock Who's there? the mailman.

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Joe: it says gullible on the ceiling Jack: yes, I wrote it -by Ross

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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