What do you get when you mix Catholicism and Islam? War

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What do you call an Arab on a plane? A passenger, you racist!

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

thumb_up thumb_down +31

trumpy trumpy trump

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Hello

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did Sam have no friends? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Q: What is black, white, and red all over? A: A nun in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What is it called when a Native American Indian man smacks a woman in the face for cheating on him? In police code it's called a "273D Domestic violence - Felony" most likely involving an insecure man with control problems simply adding to the stereotype that Native American's are drunk, abusive and domestically violent people.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

How many Weasleys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2

thumb_up thumb_down +31

There are three types of people in this world: The stupid. And the ones that can't count.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What did the virgin get for her birthday? Aids

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A prostitute has sex with a man. She gave him herpes.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

knock, knock! who`s there? it`s me ! who me? yes!

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What is purple and crawls? A wounded grape.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

How do you get a dog to obey your rules?¿¿? Threaten to beat it with a rod!¡!

thumb_up thumb_down +29

So two cannibals are eating a clown. Cannibal one: Does this taste funny to you? Cannibal two: Considering that this man was a clown he must have been in poverty so he resulted to being an alcoholic and maybe over dosed on over the counter drugs. Cannibal one: Thank you for that reasonable answer.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Some people like melon and others like soup.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do you call a Fish without the I? Astyanax mexicanus, or the Blind Cave variant of the Mexican tetra

thumb_up thumb_down +29

how many aliens does it take to change a light bulb? i wouldn't know, i have never seen one and there is the off chance that they don't even exist

thumb_up thumb_down +29

How come Michael Jackson couldn't get into the petting zoo? It was closed.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Roses are red Violets are blue Roses can also be white And violets can also be purple

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's the difference between George Michael and a microwave oven? One is a human being and the other is a resourceful appliance.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

No, we got to speak now, or you know, never.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops