Guy 1: "Hey do you want to hear a joke?" Guy 2: "Sure" Guy 1: "No."

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A man walks into a bar and asks for a shot. The bartender says ok, then hands him a pistol, then the man shoots the bartender and kills him.

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What did the Bishop say to the pebble? Wash my car

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68

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Whis a racist rapist etter than a non-racist rapist? less women getting raped

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Why can't George Washington drive? Because he died!

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The original joke: "WATCH OUT FOR THAT HOLE!" "WHAT HOLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" The anti joke, aka realistic edition: "WATCH OUT FOR THAT HOLE!" "WHAT YAAAAAAAAAAAARGHHHHHHHHH!" The ballon edition: Original: "Balloon! Watch out for that Cactus!" "What Cactussssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss..." (leaking air you slowmo) The anti-joke aka realistic version: "Balloon watch out for that pointy soda!" "What soda *pop*" Moral: None of these where the least realistic!

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What did the bi-polar girl do when she found our her ex-boyfriend was living with another woman? Nothing; she was happy for their new relationship and realized life moves on, in addition to taking the appropriate amount of medicine as directed by her doctor for her condition.

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hey

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Why did Sally fall off the swing-set? She had no arms. Knock-knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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How did the guy feel after his wife died? Pretty shitty, I'd imagine..

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What did the rat say to the snake when it ate it. Nothing for the rat is a rat and there for can not communicate through talk to the snake nor could it survive as the snake's digestive system disintegrated it in a matter of minutes.

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What did the orphan get on his birthday? Cancer.

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What did the victim say to the rapist? If you're gonna rape me, at least let me go get you a condom

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one day four teenage boys started doing drugs. They jumped off a cliff and died.

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Need an ark to save two of every animal? I noah guy.

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knock knock who's there? Andrew Oh hey Andrew come on in!

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John Rustenburg at the dinner table

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Whats brown and smells like poo?? Poo

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whats 2+2? 4

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LMFAO - "WE runnin' through these hoes like Drano?" Is that really what society has sunken to? Is this really what is accepted? Is this what we are jamming into children's moralities? Society is Screwed!

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Why did it take so long for the baby's to paint my wall? I didn't throw them hard enough.

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What do you call a person with an arrow in their head? Dead

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1912, the titanic sinks, 1913 ww1 starts, 1939, ww2 starts, 1954, the vietnam war starts, 90's, cold war. wow! the 20th century sucked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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