Knock Knock Whos there? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour who? Wait aren't you the one who's supposed to supposed tell the punchline? Oh Yeah

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William and Kate do get off their ass and do something useful for once instead of hogging the cover of intouch magazine.

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? Hello, I'm here to deliver your groceries. Ok thank you, please leave them by the front door.

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Why did the girl throw butter out the window? She was suffering from an epileptic seizure.

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Max who Max Who's there Knock knock I'm dyslexic

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How do you kill a baby quickly? The better question is why kill a baby quickly?

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Hello penis

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What's rock hard and is sharp? A rock...and my penis.

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ON THE SEVENTH DAY OF JUNE, THURSDAY HAPPENED!!!! -ilikecrepes97

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What did the catholic priest say to the little boy? Nothing sexual, that kind of behavior isn't as widespread as people think.

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What's the worst part about seeing a dead baby on the beach? The crushing sadness.

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Q: what's black and white and red all over? A: someone getting murderd on a news paper

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Knock knock Who's There? Idk, who the **** names their kid There?

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An elephant walks into a bar. He nearly levels the entire structure as he forced his way through the front door.

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what's red and green and goes 100 mph? a red and green car going over the speed limit.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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Whats worse than having a woman faking an orgasm? Having a guy fake one.

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What's worse than listening to Justin Beiber? Getting hit by a train.

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Augustus was touring his Empire and noticed a man in the crowd who bore a striking resemblance to himself. Intrigued, he asked: ‘Was your mother at one time in service at the Palace?’ ‘No, your Highness,’ he replied, ‘but my father was.

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Hi

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Q. What did Grandmother get Little Boy Johnny for Christmas? A. Nothing. She died on Thanksgiving Day.

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Why did the man cross the road? Because that it where his friend Bob lives.

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Q: Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? A: Because he's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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