A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

what do you call a deer with no eyes? no eye deer! -jpow

Why was the man late for work? Because he slept in.

Chinese food tastes so oriental sometimes, sort of like asian food

Why was 6 afraid of seven? Seven brutally abused and raped 6 as a child.

Q: What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

"Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, I have Alzheimer's. "Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, I have Alzheimer's. "Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, I have Alzheimer's.

What did the gay man say to the deaf man? I don't know, I can't hear.

You Know Wats Funny? Jokes....

What do you call someone with no legs nor arms? Mat

Did you hear about the couple that met in a revolving door? They died.

How many dead jews can you fit in a hole? Ask hitler.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite.

If she is under the age of 18 years old and is identified by your state as a minor, shes too young for you bro.

What did the african american ninja say to the jewish bartender? Can I have a beer?

Knock, knock. Whose there? Tits. Tits, who? SUCK EM'!

Why did I have sex with your mom? Because she was a beautiful individual with a fine taste in the classical arts. She also offered me a ride to her place for a delicious 3 course meal. Afterwards our romance blossomed and we decided to have sexual intercourse to show our mutual appreciation for each other.

Woman rights.

A priest walks past a mailbox with the number 666 on it. Nothing happens, because it is an ordinary mailbox.

Roses are brown, Violets are brown, Stop shitting in my garden

My new Muslim friend is the BOMB

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did a second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did a third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

69

Why did the milkman die? Because everyone dies.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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