When adolf hitler went to the chippy, He ordered a bock wurst. Later, he ate the whole thing and said he wants another.

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if youre reading this its probably because youre on anti-joke.com

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A creationist, an evolutionist, and Neanderthal Man walk into a bar. They order two beers and a glass of red wine. The bartender asks: "Will that be all?". The evolutionist says "Yes"

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How do you stop a bird from flying? Shoot it with a harpoon gun.

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A woman walks into a bar and hits it off beautifully with the young man sitting close to her. They exchange numbers, and even a small kiss before she departs. He follows her home and eats her.

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whats the difference between you're mom and you're dad none there both the same

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What did the rapist say to the woman? "If you tell anyone I'll kill you!"

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Your Momma's so ugly, she went to the grocery store, and went she got out of her car, people said, "You're ugly."

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Q: What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? A: His name.

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A scientist walks into a bar. His forehead becomes swollen.

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Q: What drug did the addict do at the Grand Canyon? A: None; after years of battling substance addiction, he came to realize the social, financial, and health consequences had significantly degraded his quality of life and was apalled by his bad decisions.

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What do you call a fat black guy in KFC? A guy who likes KFC.

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What do you call a girl with no arms or legs on the beach? Sandy What do you call that girl tossed into the water? Sandy Duncan

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What did John say to Trojan? Hi Trojan

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what did Marvin Gay's father say to him before he died? "hey come listen to this 45 real quick"

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How do you scare a bonde? tell her you want to be her uterus?

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What did the nerd say to the bully? Nothing. The bully killed him before he could say anything.

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What's worse than finding out you have aids? Nothing. Actually I lied. It would suck being an illegal immigrant.

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rebecca is a hard worker

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Zombies eat brains! (You're safe)

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Q /why do people eat dinner? A/ because their hungry

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Why did the chicken cross the road It didint make it across

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roses are red violets are blue im colorblind how about you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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