You've heard of take your child to work day, but I bet you haven't heard of 9/11- take your plane to work day

thumb_up thumb_down -39

A black guy stands outside the Tigers stadium with a cigar and tries to sell tickets... noone buys them... I have a comlplete raging boner and I'm gonna go beat off!

thumb_up thumb_down -47

What did Aaron Pfeifer say to Zach Faller ? Yee

thumb_up thumb_down -57

Q: What did the Kool-Aid Man say when he crashed through a wall? A: "OW! That hurt!"

thumb_up thumb_down -61

Q: Why doesn't Micheal Jackson have orgasms? A: Because he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -67

Two boys were walking down a building which was under construction. Suddenly a brick hits the 1 one in the head while the 2 guys aunt was in America.

thumb_up thumb_down -81

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Bushes are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

thumb_up thumb_down +58

What do you get if you cross a Sheep with a Kangeroo. An abomination unto God.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

One man says to another "Hey you have banana in your ears." The other man replies "I can't hear you, I have bananas in my ears."

thumb_up thumb_down +52

What did the mexican get for his brthday? A potatoe

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Lethal injection is a lot more humane than the electric chair. I know because nobody's complained about it yet.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Who makes the sandwiches in a lesbian relationship?

thumb_up thumb_down +50

What did John the accountant do when he saw a flying dog, He woke up from a wonderful dream and started his day

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Why didn't the woman believe in God? Her own personal beliefs.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

3 men were involved in a terrible plane crash. The first man got up, and all he could see was blue. Blue houses, blue cars, blue people. He walked into a house and asked if he could stay there, the kind people complied and let him stay there for the night. When he woke up he could still only see blue. He went down stairs and ate fruit loops, then left in his blue world. The second man got up and all he could see was red. Red houses, red cars, red people. He walked into a house and asked if he could stay there, the kind people complied and let him stay there for the night. When he woke up he could still only see red. He went down stairs and ate cherrieos, then left in his red world. The last man got up, and all he could see was yellow, yellow cars, yellow houses, and yellow poeple. Yet again he walked to a house, and the kind people let him stay the night. Once he woke up, he only could see yellow still. He went down stairs and ate fruit loops and left into his yellow world. So this proves that 2 out of 3 men prefer fruit loops over cherrieos.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Why did the Filipino hate internet advertising? Because navigating around a webpage with pestering visual and audible promotions often proves cumbersome and distracting from the task at hand.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Why did the fat kid drop his Mcdonalds? Because he had a stroke.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

How do you make friends with a squrriel? Trust me, don't.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

i got angry and i was like " i really want to kick someone" ,my friend was on the ground and shes like "you can kick me" ,and i'm like "REALLY" ,then i kicked her really hard and she cried...

thumb_up thumb_down +42

roses are violets red is blue i like doughnuts doughnuts are good

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why did the leprechaun cross the road? If you still believe in leprechauns, you need to see a doctor.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Yo mamas so fat that she slowly had developed obstructive sleep apnea syndrome and had died due to an obstruction of her upper airway while she was sleeping.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why did the chicken cross the road? Most likely to get to a source of food or escape a predator.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Because you killed my Llama. He was my best-friend.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops