What do you call a Jewish wanna be gangster? Drake

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whats the difference between jimmy saville and a horse? jimmy has a bigger cock

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What did the boy say to the ghost wearing a banana outfit? Holy crap! A ghost!

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Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a murderer.

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What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

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your momma is so dumb.. ... because she was a slacker in high school but then turned her life around and is now a respected member of society

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Why didn't little billy have any friends? Billy bought a rifle, and shot everyone he had ever seen or talked to, even his family. Billy then tripped on his walk home and fell off a bridge, and into the ocean. Then a shark came and swallowed him. That is why you should never kill your friends and family because it will come back and bite you. Don't be like billy

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How do you make time fly? You throw a clock out a window.

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a dyslexic Satan worshiper sold his soul to Santa

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What's the difference between a teacher and a train? A lot.

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what did the little boy say to little girl? I shit bricks.

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roses are red facebook is blue no mutual friends who the heck are you

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? He was on his way home from work and saw some youths loitering on the street corner and thought it best to avoid them and therefore any possible confrontation. He would also appreciate it if you would call him something along the lines of Bravery impaired instead of a chicken as he finds it offensive and doesn't fully understand the avian reference to his lack of confidence.

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the doctor says to the patient " i have some good news and some bad news" the patient says well what is it dock " well the good news is your fine " the patient asked what the bad news was and the doctor said " i lied about you being fine you have aids, and testicular cancer and you have 2 days to live"

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What do you call a highschooler who smokes weed, shops at the mall, and has date-raped one girl so far? Popular.

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A kangaroo walks into a bar, it is a fairly common occurrence in Australia and normal process is carried out of evacuating the premises and calling animal control to deal with the situation.

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Did you hear about the guy who came home one night and found his wife in bed with his best friend? He had just returned from a trip to the grocery store, where he'd purchased bread, milk, eggs, broccoli, yams, tea, and brownie mix.

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A man is on a date. His philandering causes a bitter divorce.

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What do you do when a black man points a gun at your face? you do what he tells you to do.

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How do you get a bent nail out of a board? You carefully pry it out with the back of the hammer.

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Knock Knock!! Who's There? No one, your being ding dong ditched!

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Why don't chicken wear underwear? Because their peckers are on their face

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What is the biggest lie in the entire universe? I agree to the terms of service.

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A horse walks into a mans house. The man wonders how the horse got into his house.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops