- Anti Joke

Bill: My brother died on 9/11 Steve: Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Was he in one of the towers? Bill: Both. Steve: Both? Bill: He was in one tower when the first plane hit, so he ran over to warn everybody in the other tower and while he was in the other tower, he died of AIDS. Steve: LOL Bill: Quit your laughing, Steve, and make sweet, sweet love to me! Steve: It would be my pleasure! (While Bill and Steve made sweet, sweet love on that park bench, little did they know that a hundred miles away in a beautiful Los Angeles home, actor Jeff Goldblum was making himself a turkey sandwich...not too much mayo...just the way he likes it.)

What did the person do at the stop sign? Stop

A terrorist walks into a bomb shop. He soon realizes he's in the wrong shop, leaves and goes on with his day.

What's black and twelve inches long? A Maglite.

Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they are highly trained astronauts taking part in a multi-year space journey to explore part of the solar system that man has never dreamed to be feasible.

Q: Why did the girl fall off the swing? R: Because she had no arms.

Mary had a little lamb, little lamb, little lamb Mary had a little lamb and the doctor was surprised

What do you call a penis without hair? Apple sause

An boy with ADHD walks into a

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven has a hook for one of his hands carries a chain saw in the other an gets into six's dreams...thats just scary

Q: how much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A: 14

Women.

What did John the accountant do when he saw a flying dog, He woke up from a wonderful dream and started his day

Why didn't the elephant do any tricks? It was dead.

Hey I just meet you And this is crazy I took bath salts Your face looks tasty

A white guy, a black guy, and a spanish guy jump off a building. They all die on impact and their families mourn their loss for years to come.

What's yellow and highly dangerous? Shark-infested banana pudding.

There was a man who had a camel, but one day he lost his camel. He wanted to go and look for it but he couldnt because he had to go to work. So the next morning he went to look for his camel. He went over the road and saw a gate, but he couldnt through because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate and saw a forest, but he couldnt through because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest and saw a hill,but he couldnt go down the hill because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill and saw a river,but he couldnt go over the river because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river and saw a house, but he couldnt go to the house because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house and saw a door, but he couldnt knock on the door because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, and saw a man, but he couldnt speak to the man because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, saw a man, and asked the man, "have you seen my camel?", but the man couldnt respond because he had to go to work The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, saw a man, and asked the man, "have you seen my camel?", and the man said, "no"

There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

how do you make a door cry? twist its nob

Why did Susie fall off the swing Because she had no arms. Knock knock... Whose there... Not Susie Why did the plane crash Susie was flying it

If the red house is made out of red bricks, the yellow house is made out of yellow bricks, and the blue house is made out of blue bricks, what is the greenhouse made of? Ah, I see what you did there. You are expecting me to follow the sequence based on how each house is made out of bricks the same color as their title. However, I am one step ahead of you and I know that the greenhouse is made out of glass panels. But what if it were made out of green glass panels? Then, I suppose, the sequence could continue naturally yet we still have a problem of units - bricks vs. glass. Quite the dilemma we are facing.

What do you get when you mix Catholicism and Islam? War

The biggest joke in anti-joke are these two MOST FAVED What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. +17662 likes MOST HATED whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? the pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven -1714 dislikes GUESS WHAT : they are both jew jokes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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