how do you starve a man who is on welfare? hide his food stamps under his work boots.

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What did the boy do when he struck out in his little league game? He was very upset and contemplated not playing the game anymore.

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Whats brown,looks like a.dike,and is a whore. Marcella

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Q: Who lives in a pinaple under the sea? A: Garry

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what does a blonde say when she walks into a bar? ouch

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why is six afraid of seven? because seven is a rapist.

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A zebra was on his way to a water hole. On the way he met 6 giraffes. Each giraffes had 3 monkeys around their neck. Each monkey had 2 birds on their head. How many animals went to the water hole? A:One, the zebra.

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wood cant chuck wood

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What do the words lightbulb and lightweight have in common? The word light is in both words. Other than that absolutely nothing.

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Why did you insult me and then punch me in the face? The hell if you care anymore, I killed you straight after. Neo-Nero. (Rest in peace Nero7 better known as The Moral Man, I hope I can one day live up to your greatness.) Moral: "Keep your spirits up, we are all going to die sometime, but life means nothing if we lose faith in ourselves and each other" Moral 2: "Nero Septimus, that will be my first and last moral that made a figment of fucking sense, if you are watching from whatever comes from life, I know that this is what you would have done, but just so you know and always wanted for us that followed you, I am doing this for my own goddamn fucking self, respects... Now if your ghost is still watching, get the fuck out of my room you damn cripple, and know that your arm is somewhere in the basement because its so goddamn bad ass that it fucking freaks me out, and so fucking heavy that I think you where some sort of superhuman, now gtfo, as you taught us, we cant focus on the goddamn afterlife, if we are gonna get the best out of life and the present, adios amigo"

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Q. You know what sucks A. Being an orphan

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What's worse than a bee sting? A katon.

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Okay, I just really want you to trust me again,

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where wally? wallys a myth.

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Girls

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call me a bitch You're a bitch Only bitches do what they are told!

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- Mom, you've got a banana in your ear. - Son I can't hear you I've got a banana in my ear!

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What do you call a black man climbing a mountain. A mountain climber.

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shauns beautiful

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What did the white man say to the group of mexicans when a golf ball was coming toward them? 4!

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A boy has a penis, a girl has a vagina.

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Yo mamma's so old... oh way no she's dead

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A red-head, a brunette, and a blonde are playing hide-and-seek. Hide-and-seek is a fun game, so they probably had a great time.

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What did the pear say to the plum? Nobody knows - the plum was deaf and didn't hear, the pear knows only dirty words in sign language, and there was nobody else around to overhear.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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