How do you make an eggroll? You push it.

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What do you call a chicken with it's head chopped off. A decapitated chicken.

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" So let's set the world on fire..." Q: How do you do that? A: Strike a match...

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What do you say to a black man on fire... Stop, drop and roll !!!

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Why didn't the man eat the carrots? Because he was a vegetarian.

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what is the difference between having sex and having sex on my period ..... i have something to drink when i have sex on my period

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Why Did The Girl Cry? Old People Are Funny.

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Roses are red Roses are pink Roses are yellow Roses are white

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Knock Knock There was no answer as the house was empty.

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Yes and no, I am into literature, I am a writer, of how to rape and kill guides for the whole family (raping the whole family that is, again instructions for the whole family with inspirational quotes) Now give an example of each book to each family member without a cover stating what the book is... ...And after the first time, the world was never the same again.

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Q. What did Grandmother get Little Boy Johnny for Christmas? A. Nothing. She died on Thanksgiving Day.

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Why did the room packed with married people seem empty? Maybe they were all playing hide-and-seek. Or maybe the room was pitch black and they were all standing very still and quietly.

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I was in the middle of downloading a porno of two hot girls getting it on, my computer got a virus and crashed.

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Magic is another word for "poorly perceived analysis of the mechanics of this complex instrumentality we call optical illusion."

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Why couldn't the Irishman walk in a straight line? Because he was a retard.

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Why did hale say I have but one life to give for my country? He has one life

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Yo momma's so ugly, she decided to get plastic surgery and now has much higher self-esteem.

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What did the the policeman say to the band member who trashed a hotel room? "You're under arrest" The band member replied "Well, you're under a vest" The policeman reiterates that this isn't the time to be making any jokes and that vandalism is a very serious offence

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Why did the man have 3 girlfriends? A: because he is a womanizer

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What did the little boy with cancer say right before he died? Nothing. He was very sick and could not speak at all during his final weeks.

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Why does Brianne cry? Because she has no family.

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Knock knock Who's There? Idk, who the **** names their kid There?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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two goldfish are in a tank they swim around happily and have no consciousness of what is happening because of their short memory.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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