There is a man with the surname of Westmoreland. This is a terrible name.

People could crack eggs but Chuck Norris could crack chickens.

"jrfevkhbgjk" said the retard.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was unaware that it could get run over by a motor vehicle.

A germaphobe is in a room full of sick people. He leaves.

Whats a black persons favorite flavored cake? fried chicken.

Do u liek mudkipz GO TROLLING

roses are red violets are blue ur family is dead and u will die too

why did the jew cross the road? the ss was chasing him and his family to kill him so he ran across the street to same his family, he got hit by a truck and his family was killed...

what do you call an ocelot with ebola? an ocelot that might die soon.

How many Jew can you fit in a car? As many as the car seats comfortably.

Why did the virgin jerk until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

i jack off in the school bathroom #yolo -toby limbers

your mums so fat she has to use a matress as a tampon

What did the snow flake which could talk say to the other snow flake which could talk None of us are the same.

So three men walk into a bar. One orders a Miller Light, the other orders a Guiness, and the third has a glass of ice water. He was the designated driver.

feces

What's worse than being the last man on earth with thousands of women to please? Realizing that you are gay and there are no men left.

Your mother is so rotund, in fact she went to a weight loss clinic... but gained weight

What's black and bleeding? Who cares?

how many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? usually one but depending on the severity of the patients' case the lightbulb will be changed by a person who is willing to offer their assistance as to prevent any form of accident taking place.

knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock kock ding dong ding di-ding dong zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz sigh weeeeeeeeeewooooooooooooooooo zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz hey yo wake up zzz-oh-huh-what-whos there i've been yelling for like five minutes oh sorry jim will you let me in already all right

a blonde, a brunette and a red head are robbing a bank, they hear the police coming, so they try to find a place to hide. The red head hides in cat cage, the brunette hides in dog cage and the blonde hides in potatoe sack. When the police come the brunetter says "Woof, Woof!" the red head says "MEOW! MEOW!" and the blonde says "P-O-T-A-T-O-E!"

Why was the white man rich and the black man poor? Because when the white man was 11 and he didn't have a job because 11 year olds don't get hired, because its not legal, he use to pick up pennies. And when the black man was 11 he got a job mowing lawns and ended up being a lawyer graduate and spent the rest of his life paying off his school loan. The white man lived in the 70's and the black man lived in he twentieth century.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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