whats 2+2? 4

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What did one Black man say to the other Black man before they ate? I hope you're hungry!

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How do you make your children nice? You dont have any.

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There's 2 cows, one says to the other "What do you think of Mad Cow Disease?" The other says, "I don't care I'm a helicopter"

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What's the difference between watermelon and baby? I don't eat watermelon.

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Why can't George Washington drive? Because he died!

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A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation is known as fishing for compliments. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. My mom went to the doctor and found out she has cancer, so when she told me, I was eccentric. That tree is green.

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What did the man say to his wife at the funeral. Nothing, he was dead

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What did the man do when he was tired Nothing he went to bed

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Knock knock (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) Fuck me, that's the most echo-y door I've ever knocked on.

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What happens when you throw a green stone into the red sea? It gets wet.

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hi corey

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What's the difference between Mike Tyson and Anna Nicole Smith? Mike Tyson's not dead.

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Knock, knock. *answers door*

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Why did the mushroom get invited to the party? He is a fun-gi!!

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How do you keep an idiot busy? Why would you wanna keep an idiot busy, it's not gonna make a difference...

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Q: What do you call a Deer with no eyes? A: No ideer. Q; What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? A: Still no ideer.

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What do you call a pair of owls? Two owls.

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Why did the blonde get fired from the M&Ms factory? Because she slapped the boss when he made a pass at her. Afterwhich she reported the incident to her Union and the boss was fired for Sexual Harassment. She was then rehired with a substantial increase in salary.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. So was my son after I beat him to death.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead.

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Why did the man wear a blue shirt? He didn't. He wore a green one.

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What's black and has been free since the 1700's? What? I don't know, i was asking you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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