a black man a chinese man and a mexican man are all on a plane. they land safely and continue with their lives.

Me: You know what's funnier than 24. Friend: 25? Me: No, 9/11

Why did the blind man cross the road? To end the suffering of a lifetime illness.

Blonde: "What does IDK stand for?" Brunette: "I don’t know." Blonde: "OMG, nobody does!"

Why did little Timmy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus.

Your mom is absolutely pefect. This makes me love HIM.

Q - What do you call a hamburger without pickles? A - You call it a hamburger just without the pickles.

Tom has 24 cupcakes Tom then ate 24 cupcakes what does Tom have? Diabetes Tom got diabetes

Knock knock Who's there? Carrot Carrot who? Carrot in the tree house, cause it's orange.

A teenage girl walks into a dark alley. She emerges on the other side completely unharmed.

What did the pornstar do after the film shoot? Called her parents and said she had a good day at work as a receptionist at a law firm. She is too ashamed to admit her real profession to them. She then cried profusely.

What do you call a white man flying a plane? A pilot. What do you call an Arab man flying a plane? Also a pilot.

What is 4 letters and made out of wood? Wood.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because her dad through a fridge at her

Why did the man try to lick his elbow? Because he read a chain email saying no one could lick their elbow and he wanted to see if it was true. You will probably try to do it now too.

What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time is irrelevant in this scenario because if this question is based in the United States it is highly unlikely an elephant will be near a fence you own, let alone sit on it, an activity rarely done by elephants and usually projected by humans onto other animals.

How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? usually one new yorker.

what did the homeless guy get for christmas nothing!

Why couldn't Jim pogo-stick? He didn't have one.

What is red and doesnt exist? No-tomato.

What did the the boy get from his grandma for Christmas. Nothing. she died a week ago.

Billy Corgan: The world is a vampire! Me: No it's not. The world is a mass of mineral compounds that floats in space approximately 93,020,000 miles from the sun. It is not, in fact, a vampire.

Why couldn't the cat drink his milk? Because he didn't have a face

What did one hipster say to the other hipster? I'm not a hipster.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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